Can Your Brain Tell When It’s Getting Stupider?

So let me begin by glorifying College Humor. It’s a great site with a lot of funny videos. They have a great mind for five-minute humor. I go there pretty much every day to laugh my ass off. On that note, let me tell you about my journey: I’m quitting my job. That means I don’t want or have to do work. The problem is, I have a lot of time on my hands from 9:00 in the morning to 6:00 at night (roughly, punctuality is not a concern either). To fill the hours, I decided to embark on a mission.

I’ve been a regular College Humor visitor for a few months, but the site has some 6,500 videos, of which I had barely cracked the surface. So, off to video number one I went, to begin the journey to the latest video: to watch ALL the videos that College Humor had to offer.

This was a terrible idea, for many reasons. People are really stupid and think really stupid stuff is funny — I would know. There are a lot of bad (rather, unfunny) videos on the website. For example, the things you and your friends think are hilarious, but it turns out that you had to be there for it to be funny.

But, on the fortunate side, I have been able to assess my own little mini social-observation experiment, and I’d like to share some of my findings:

1. Dorms look the same at every college.
2. I’m very glad I never lived in a dorm.
3. College kids have a lot of free time and spend most of it drinking.
4. College kids do stupid things when they’re drunk.
5. Watching people hurt themselves will never stop being funny.

And, um…

Also…

I forget. I seem to be losing brain cells as the hours go by.

Ok, only 3500 videos to go.

No, it’s probably supposed to be like that.

“I wanted to join the Optimist’s Club, but I was afraid they wouldn’t accept my application.”
-Anonymous

This makes me feel safe at work. Although I never work with hazardous or caustic chemicals, I wonder if this will ever come back to bite me in the ass.

1000 Word Review: The Other Boleyn Girl

Keeping the Dream Alive

Ten in a row!!!!! I can barely believe it. I have serious hopes at our chances this year. Now, we just have to take care of some other issues.

EDIT: Also, can we feel a little love for Brian Campbell?

Steve who?

[UPDATE: The dream is over. (Oilers’ goaltender) Dwayne Roloson is a bitch.]

I Don't Trust You Anymore, Heidi

I enjoy having a GPS device. It’s helpful when you don’t know where you’re going, but what do you do when your GPS device is lost as well?

My GPS device has a girl’s voice, ergo I named her Heidi. The other day, I went cake-tasting in Livermore with my fiance. On our way back home, I couldn’t remember how to get back to the freeway, so I busted out Heidi, and asked for help. What ensued was a 25 minute goose chase of Heidi leading me through back roads and Heidi getting constantly confused about where she was going. Eventually the two of us fumbled our way back onto a freeway and made it home safely (mostly because I stopped listening to what the GPS was saying).

All in all, I think I’m going to be less blindly trustful of the GPS machine.

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 My Crown of Thorns?

My coworker and I have recently been having an ongoing discussion about web browsers.

This comic provides some perspective to the argument. This one too.

I am a staunch Firefox user, and am (nearly) physically revolted at people who still use Internet Explorer.

My friend uses Opera, an awesome browser with some crazy features. I
had heard of opera before, but I haven’t actually used it. My friend
showed me feature after feature that constantly impressed me. I
refused to believe that Firefox couldn’t do anything that Opera could.

*Cue song - “Anything you can do…”*

Enter the beauty of Firefox Add-Ons. Almost every feature that Opera
touts can be done or emulated in Firefox with addons. I proceeded to
show my friend how my “pimped” Firefox now is as good as his Opera, and
all he could do was mock me.

My friend - “If you’re going to make it work like Opera, why don’t you just use Opera?”

Me - “…”

My friend - “That’s what I thought.”

So now our catch-phrase is “Maybe there’s a Firefox Extension for that…”

[Update: I’m still not switching to Opera.]

World's Worst Toilet Training Tool

I have no idea where this came from or why, but with my ridiculous sense of humor, I am inclined to believe that someone thought that this might be conducive to teaching children boys not to miss the bowl when peeing.